Let's Stop Playing it Safe

For most of my life I’ve played it pretty safe.  I’m usually the girl on the sidelines watching others make brave, bold moves.  You see, I’m not a natural risk-taker.  I’m a risk-weigher, if there is such a thing.  In every situation I weigh the risks and possible outcomes for each decision.  Sounds exciting right?  Yeah, not so much. 

I’ve watched friends journey to the other side of the world as missionaries to share Jesus with those who don’t know Him.  I’ve watched women be unafraid to pursue their God-given callings.  I’ve seen friends write books and launch new ministries and love on people that others pass by on a daily basis. Through all of it I find myself wishing I could be as brave as they are.

Seeing all of this inspires a bravery I desire, but I’m not sure I have in me.  But I desperately want it.  I want to bravely love Him.  I want to say yes when He calls me to the scary waters.  I want to radiate freedom because that’s what He’s given me through His Son.  I want to walk in His Truth so the enemy has no claim over me, because he has already been defeated. I long to be brave and risk it all for God like others seem to do, but something about full surrender to Him just makes it all too scary.

Over the last year I’ve been pursuing a deeper heart change.  The more I get closer to God, the more I realize that I’ve been playing it safe for too long.  Safe with opportunities.  Safe with relationships and really loving others.  Safe with Him. 

Frankly, I want to stop playing it so safe.  I want to push the boundaries and feel my knees knocking in the way they do when you know something is scary but also worthwhile.  I want to stop being so afraid that I will take a misstep, because I know, like we all do, that sometimes missteps are necessary to get to the more honest place with Him and the bigger calling inside of us. 

I’ve had to step back and ask myself a really hard question. Do I really want God?  I know that I need God.  It’s not a question of need.  It’s a question of want and desire. 

Do I really want God?  Do I want Him enough to be called out of my comfort zone? To go outside of the church walls and love on broken people? 

Am I willing to give up things for Him?  Things that make me happy, things that make my life easier? 

Am I willing to surrender fully to Him?  To His will?  To His calling on my life?  To release the people that I hold the closet to my heart?

Do I really want God enough to follow Him into places I would not normally go? 

Am I living a life that wants God?  Do I want Him over comfort? Over the approval of others?  Over material things and worldly success?

The honest answer to that is no.  I’m not so sure I’ve been wanting Him badly enough to feel uncomfortable.  I don’t think I’ve been desiring Him enough to strap on my boots and really do scary Kingdom work for Him.  To love people that are different than me.  To trust Him in a fearless way.   I think I’ve been living a very comfortable Christian life.  I obey God as much as I want to, but I don’t ever fully surrender myself to Him. 

I recently immersed myself in Acts 28:30-31. 

“For two whole years Paul stayed there in his own rented house and welcomed all who came to see him.  He proclaimed the kingdom of God and taught about the Lord Jesus Christ—with all boldness and without hindrance!”

Those last few words about Paul have not left me since I read them.  With all boldness and without hindrance.  Paul taught about Jesus with boldness and proclamation.  He didn’t care what others thought about him. He didn’t care about his comfort or likeability. He cared most about God.  I could take a note or two from this. 

Really what I admire most about Paul is his brazenness for the Gospel.  He didn’t hold back when it came to church conduct or how we should treat one another as believers.  And he most certainly never held back from proclaiming what Jesus had done for him once his life had been changed by Him.

Moment of truth?  I know what it is that holds me back from being more like Paul.  The truth is I’m more afraid of how God will use me if I’m truly set free than if I were too stay comfortable.

I say I want this unhindered life, but I don’t really want to work for it.  I don’t really want to walk it out in faith.  Because what if living a life unhindered and desiring Him above anything else meant giving up a job I love, or relationships, leaving church roles, or moving?

What if all that seems scary because the life God calls us to live as His children is one of complete and utter trust and surrender to Him, and that is something that deep down, we lack. We doubt if God will really come through on His end so we hold tight to the things we need most to let go of.  Relationships. Dreams. Jobs. Our marriages and children.

And we tell ourselves that we’re just being protective. We want God to use us, but not enough to feel uncomfortable or sad or scared.  We want Him to use us just enough to feel like we’re doing our part, but we don’t ever let Him really do His.

I don’t know about you, but I don’t want to live with a Plan B.  I want to know that at the end of my days, I’ve given Him everything I could possibly give Him.  I want to know I ran the race with every ounce of courage and determination that I could.  (Hebrews 12:1)  And yes, that will mean giving up things for Him and surrendering it all and yes, that scares me. 

But I don’t want to do it safe.  I don’t want to hinder myself when it comes to God.

And I get the feeling that deep down, you don’t want to do it safe either.  So why don’t we both just go for it?  You jump, I jump.  If we fall, we fall.  But we won’t fail.  The only way we fail is to keep playing it safe, keep daydreaming of a life unhindered but never getting up our nerve to say “Yes God, use me.”

God gives us free will to choose and ultimately the choice is ours friend. Do we want safe?  Do we want comfortable?  Or do we want God?

I confess, I used to judge the rich young ruler in Matthew 19.  I used to read his story and get so frustrated with him. I would sit there and think my gosh man, Jesus is right in front of you!  How could you not follow Him?  Why couldn’t you just leave it all behind?  Don’t you see the personal invitation you’re getting?

I used to judge him until one day I realized that I was just like him.  Afraid to give it all up and terrified to have to be uncomfortable for Jesus. Scared that He’ll ask me to do something that defies all logic.  Fearful of what others may think. Hesitant to think of what a life lived fully for Him really looks like.

Because it doesn’t look like comfortability friends.  It doesn’t look like logic or approval from others. It means we don’t always know what’s next.  We don’t have the control we often crave. It looks like a life of being unsettled in all the very best ways because when He moves, He moves in mighty ways.

Jesus extended a personal invitation to the young ruler.  His command was simple. In verse 21 He says,

“If you want to be perfect, go, sell your possessions and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven. Then come, follow me.”

“Come, follow me.”  I have the same personal invitation as the rich young ruler.  You do too friend. 

He can’t change his decision now but we can change ours.  We can say yes to the invitation of following Him, no matter the cost and change our course for eternity. The rich young ruler played it safe.  He didn’t want to give up his wealth (vs.22) or his comfort.  He didn’t want to give up the life he was living.  And man, did he miss out.

I don’t want us to miss the same invitation friends.  Let’s stop playing it so safe and let’s start being brave enough to let Him have every last ounce of us.  Let’s get off the sidelines of our faith and want God more than we ever have before.

What do you say?

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The Beauty of Just a Few: Encouragement for When Your Small Group is Struggling

You anxiously wait for their arrival.  You set out your materials, get out your Bible and turn to the story or scripture you want to share.  You go over your lesson in your head one more time.  You’ve been over it numerous times, but once more won’t hurt.  It makes you feel more prepared.  You see headlights shining as cars begin to pull in.  You put on your leader hat because the time has come to start.

You welcome people as they arrive.  It’s just a few for now. More will come.  You look at the clock. 

Give them five more minutes. 

You make small talk with those present and tell them that you’ll get started in just a few minutes, you’re just waiting for the others to arrive. 

But the time passes and no one else comes.  You need to begin.

You only have a few people.  You smile at the group and say something like “well it looks like it’s just going to be us!” 

You take one more look out into the parking lot. Nope.  No one.  You take a deep breath in and then you begin.   

Have you been in this situation before?  I certainly have.  It can be disheartening, certainly discouraging, even downright frustrating at times.  You feel like a failure, like you’ve done something wrong. 

Did I forget to remind people?  Did people not see the announcement in the church bulletin?  What about all those Facebook reminders? 

It happens.  So today I would love to give you some encouragement for when you feel like your small group is struggling. 

I use the term small group very loosely because for some of you “small group” may mean 5-6 people, for others its 20-30.  Some churches call them “life groups” or “mission groups.” In whatever way this applies to you, I hope you will get some encouragement today.

I would love to start with a personal example.  Just recently over the last year I really began struggling with one of the small groups I lead.  Attendance was at an all-time low, I felt burned out and to be quite honest, I felt like maybe the girls were losing interest in it and we all should move on to something else.   

I was measuring the success of the group based on the numbers.  While mathematically this probably makes sense, from a spiritual standpoint I couldn’t have been more off. 

I devoted time in prayer over it and I was able to discern The Lord telling me not to let it go yet. 

 But Lord, I thought, we only have a few girls, sometimes just one girl, how can we continue to grow with just a few?  

Don’t let it go yet. Pour more into it.

I was getting my answer and now was the time to trust that God would be faithful and He would begin a new work in our group.

Over the past six months I have seen more growth in our small group than ever before.  We have grown in numbers, welcoming two new girls into our group.  We have exciting mission projects planned and the best part of all, I have seen such spiritual growth in the girls. 

They are grasping Biblical concepts better than ever before.  They are coming up with their own ways to serve in their schools and within their circle of family and friends.  They are chasing hard after the God who created them and it’s simply beautiful to watch and be a part of.

And to think that I wanted to give up on it because we were only having “just a few.”

Friend, let me tell you.  There is beauty in just a few. 

The world and at times even our churches will place more emphasis on things that will reach the most people, draw in the biggest numbers.  This isn’t a bad thing, but I’ve learned that building a relationship with “just a few” is just as essential as reaching the masses. Relationships draw people in.  Relationships keep people coming back.     

I understand how frustrating it can be to only have a few people show up after you’ve spent so much time preparing for your lesson or your event.  But don’t get into the mindset that I did and let the numbers guide how you serve. 

There have been times when I have lead a Bible study and an average of 20 women showed up.  The next time I lead one, it was a great night if 6 or 7 women showed up.  What changed?  Was it me?  Was it the Bible study I picked?

It may have been one of those things, I don’t know.  But the more realistic perspective to have is that everything happens in seasons.  Your small group will ebb and flow.  Did you know that your group will go through seasons too?

People get busy, especially women.  Maybe their children are involved in a sport that meets on the same night as your group meeting.  Maybe childcare is an issue and they don’t have a babysitter.  Maybe it has nothing to do with church or with you at all.  Maybe they are going through a tough time in their lives and they are drained, spent. Going to group is just beyond their emotional abilities at the time. 

It’s normal to see attendance drop off in times of busy seasons and then see it rise up again.  With every small group there are seasons of pruning and there are seasons of growth.  It’s hard to be patient during these seasons, but John 15:2 tells us

^“He cuts off every branch of mine that doesn’t produce fruit, and he prunes the branches that do bear fruit so they will produce even more.” (NLT)

During these pruning seasons, ask God to show you how you can better serve your small group.  Do you need to order new and fresh materials?  Should your group do a different mission project this year than they have done in the past?  Is there a greater need that needs to be met in your group? 

I have seen the reward come from my seasons of pruning.  Growth happens.  Although not always in the way I think it will.  Maybe you don’t see growth in numbers, but you see spiritual growth.  Maybe you see relationships and bonds form between the women in your small group where there were none before. 

This is where the beauty of just a few comes in.

You don’t need to have a large group to make a lasting impact on someone.  You may not think you’re making an impact on the few people you are serving.  I guarantee that you are.  You never know how your group lesson will impact someone.  You never know how sharing some of your own story can effect someone so greatly that they become brave enough to boldly proclaim me too.  Your work for The Lord never goes to waste. 

I have been so encouraged by this verse from 1 Corinthians 15:

If your small group is struggling and you’re ready to give up and let it go, I would love to encourage you not to.  It’s easy to throw in the towel and give up.  It takes more faith and courage to keep going.  Your group will experience seasons, it’s up to you to decide how you will lead your group through those seasons.   

There is beauty in just a few.

We are told in Matthew 18:20:

"For where two or three gather together as my followers, I am there among them.”

If you are in a season of pruning in your small group, I pray you experience the blessing of growth!  If your current season is one of abundance, I pray that on the days when you are struggling, you will remember whose child you are and you will be encouraged that He has made everything beautiful in its time. 

Are you currently struggling with your small group?

Leaders, how can I pray for you?

If you are part of a small group, what do you enjoy the most about it?

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To the Women Who Hold My Babies at Church

Where should I begin?

Thank you.

Those two words are loaded with more gratitude than anything I could ever write or say.  I often think of you.  I think of what made you so compassionate.  So willing to serve.  So willing to give of your time.

Is it that you enjoy the tight hugs and sloppy kisses from little ones?

Is it that you are drawn to little ones that need to learn the love of Jesus just as much as the adults that walk through the church doors?

Is it a calling you feel the Lord has placed on your life?

Or is it that you simply see me, a mama who often needs an extra set of hands, trying her best to raise her babies in the church?

Maybe in some way it is all of these.  Whatever the reason, you have no idea the gratitude and love I have for you in my heart. 

It must seem most Sunday’s that we are rushed.  We rush into the nursery.  We rush into the sanctuary, putting children where they need to go, leaving them in your hands so that we can worship. You probably think what you do is small, not even worth recognition.  You may think that all you do is babysit the children.  Let me tell you why what you do is not small at all.  Let me express my heart to you and for what you do…it’s immeasurable to me. 

If it weren’t for you, I couldn’t participate in worship. 

I couldn’t hold a microphone every Sunday, pouring out my heart through song and praise. 

I couldn’t sit in the sanctuary, Sunday after Sunday soaking up the word of God.

Your gift allows me to learn more about my gifts and calling.  It allows my husband and me to sit side by side with one another and take a few moments to breathe in the grace we both so desperately need.  I want you to know that your compassion for giving up your own time to worship doesn’t go unnoticed. 

I know it may seem like all you do is wipe noses, pick up toys, and try to keep the children from running around like chickens with their heads cut off.  Or maybe that’s just my child.    

But oh, you do so much more.

Did you know you’re helping us lay a foundation for our children?   There will come a time when the things you have done and the time you have given become part of a much larger plan and purpose for our children. 

You are a woman of influence.

Thank you for your dedication.  Thank you for serving in this most unique way.  Whether you spend time changing babies’ diapers, or coloring a picture of wee Zacchaeus in his tree for the thousandth time, you matter.  You are helping lay the foundation of Christ in our little ones.  You are showing them what service looks like, no matter the duty.  You are showing them dedication in the most beautiful way.

They won’t understand it…yet. 

But one day, one day, they will hold hands with their little ones and leave them in someone else’s hands so that they can go worship.  They will have the privilege of taking a few moments to themselves to breathe and reboot just as we do.  They will have the privilege because of you.  Because you helped their parents learn how to raise godly children.  And it will trickle down the generations.  The little ones who noses you wiped, and who you taught all those Bible songs to, now they are warriors for Jesus. 

And so for that and so much more, this mama can’t thank you enough. 

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