It’s Okay that You’re Not Okay

Hey friend,


I know you’re trying so hard to hold it together right now.  I know it seems like everything is falling apart and you don’t know which way to turn.  I know that it all seems out of control and grasping at straws is how you live your life nowadays.  Can I tell you something?


It’s okay that you’re not okay right now. 


It’s okay that life seems restless and chaotic.  Topsy turvy even. That doesn’t mean it feels good.  I know it doesn’t.  It’s draining. It’s daunting. Sometimes even down right painful.   
  

But friend?  


Just stop. Stop pretending right now. You don't have to fake it another minute. You don’t have to pretend that it’s all okay or that you’ve got everything under control. You don’t have to keep trying to figure out what is coming next. You don’t even have to pretend to like your current circumstance. 

I know the guard you’ve got up. Hell-bent on trying to prove to others that you’re holding it all together, that you’re taking it all like a pro. That you can handle anything that is thrown at you. 


But the reality of it friend? We can't. We can't handle any of it without Him.


You don’t have to always be okay.  Because it’s during the times of being unsettled and restless when we will continually seek God.  We will probably seek Him harder than we ever have before.  And we should.  We should chase Him down because He is the only hope we've got to get through it.  

It's during those times of not being okay when our prayers are prayed in desperation and sometimes hopelessness.  And all of that works together for our good in the messiest and most beautiful ways. 


Friend, just hang in there. 


This is where God often does His best work.  Oh yes.  The times when you're on your knees in desperation and complete surrender. Unsure of the future. Even downright burdened and overwhelmed with the current circumstance. Stuck in the ick and can’t get out.  This is where we draw close to our Creator.  The One who goes before us and knows our every need. 


This season of not being okay is temporary.  You need to know this.  I know that right now it doesn’t feel that way.  I know that right now you can’t see an end to it all and you’re wondering where in the world God is in all of this and what you’re supposed to do next.  


How can God redeem this?  How can He bring good from this?  


Oh sweet friend, you just watch.  

I know it's hard, but it’s okay to release those things to Him. The things you want to hold so tightly to, but know you can't.  Your children. Your marriage. Your dreams. The things you don’t understand in this world.  You can release it all to Him.  You can stop worrying about whether or not God will come through on His end.  He will. Because He’s the same God He’s always been.  He hasn’t changed.  

The same God that provided manna each day for the Israelites as they wandered in the wilderness is still the same God we serve today.  The same God that walked in the fire with Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego and allowed them to come back without even a hair singed still lives today.  The same God who took the widow’s two mites and blessed them still reigns.  And the same God who came down on this earth in human form is alive and wants to be Lord of your life.  

So get desperate for Him.  Be hungry for His word and His promises. Wait with expectation that He will do something in you.  Something only He can do.   


It’s okay that you’re not okay today friend.  Maybe tomorrow you will be okay. Really okay, not the fake okay. And maybe it's next week. Next month. A year from now. At some point you will be okay again.  


Until then, know that in the stillness of waiting, God is there with you. He will not give up on you and He will most certainly not fail you. You can let go.  You don't have to pretend with Him.  He's got you and He's not letting go.  





Need a little extra encouragement today?  Try this friend. 

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When You're Overwhelmed with the Brokenness

You don’t even have to turn on the news to know that our world is in a desperate state of brokenness.  Countries are divided.  People are endlessly suffering.  Nothing seems secure or even safe anymore.  Brokenness is everywhere.

I’ve had to stop reading the articles.  I’ve had to turn off the TV and get off social media.  I cannot hear about one more child being abused.  One more brothel being raided (though this is a good outcome) or one more issue dividing God’s people.  Shootings.  Wildfires.  Severe flooding.  My heart is just hurting for God’s people.  It’s not that I want to keep my head in the sand and pretend it isn’t happening.  I know it’s happening.  I cannot deny it. 

I am simply overwhelmed by all the brokenness.  

Do you ever feel this way? 

You want to help.  You want to reach out and comfort those that are hurting.  You want to take the pain away from your brothers and sisters.  But you don’t know where to start or even if you can help.  There are so many people who need help. Who need love and compassion.

What do you do when you’re just plain overwhelmed with all the brokenness?   

What do we do when the problems of the world seems so vast and unreachable?

We must simply begin.  We begin by acknowledging that as individuals, we cannot take on everyone’s burdens.  That is not our job that is Jesus’ job.  He already took care of that when He died on the cross.  I once heard Jill Savage say in an interview that she found great peace in knowing that even Jesus during his years of ministry went to bed every night knowing not everyone was healed.  There was always more healing to be done. 

We begin by recognizing that not everyone’s brokenness looks the same.  As believers who are supposed to be the Body of Christ, we have to stop deciding whose brokenness is worthy.  Friends, we are all broken in some way.  Brokenness doesn’t fit into a box and neither does Jesus.  As The Body we should acknowledge and encourage each other no matter the struggle. 

When I look at our world today, even when I look at The Church today, sometimes I get very sad.  I get overwhelmed with how much work there is still to be done before Jesus comes back.  I look at the state of things and I’m often discouraged.  There is no way we can do all this Kingdom work.  It’s too hard.  The suffering is too great. 

But then I am gently reminded about this whole bearing brokenness thing.  You see, it’s what the Body of Christ was designed to do.  Reaching out to our fellow brothers and sisters regardless of any differences, helping to bear the weight of their heartbreaks and struggles. And while it breaks my heart to see people’s pain and the devastation of certain situations, I know that’s how God has designed us-to hurt for one another.

If we weren’t created to love one another and to bear one another’s burdens, then what is the point of being The Body of Christ?

Ultimately we know that the brokenness and suffering of the world will go on and it will not cease until Jesus returns to take us home.  He is the answer to the brokenness.  He always has been. But there is something we can do in the meantime.  

Being part of The Body means we must put on our armor and go out and fight for our brothers and sisters.  Fight in prayer.  Fight through loving them fiercely.  Fight for The Kingdom of God to bring healing to those hurting.  (2 Corinthians 10:3)

And you my sweet friend, have the opportunity to be a part of that if you would like to. When you’re overwhelmed with the brokenness, do you know what you do?

You start small.  You do what you can for people.  (2 Corinthians 8:12)

Start with your family, your friends, your church or community.  Sometimes it’s as simple as spreading kindness.  Pay for someone’s order next time you go through the drive thru.  Compliment someone you normally wouldn’t.  Offer grace and compassion instead of judgement to the next person you see in line to get help or assistance.  You would probably be surprised at how welcomed that emotion would be.  You see friend,

Every action we take has the ability to point others to Jesus.

Use your calling.  If you feel called and overburdened with the issue of human trafficking, go volunteer for an agency on the front lines of the issue.  If it simply breaks your heart to think of someone going without food or shelter, start there.  Do a mission project for families that are homeless or in transition, or go volunteer at a shelter or agency that helps families. 

God will break our hearts for many things as The Body, but He will break our hearts for some very specific things that relate to our callings.  He will impress certain areas of brokenness on us that point directly to what He has called us to do for His Kingdom.

Maybe for you it’s helping families.  Maybe it’s working with animals.  Maybe it’s world hunger.  Disaster relief.  Women’s issues.  The list could go on.  Don’t ignore those heart tugs. 

Friends, we are called to do better.  We are called to help our brothers and sisters.  To use the gifts and strengths that God has given us to help heal the world’s brokenness until Jesus’ return. 

Sometimes I do get overwhelmed with the sadness of our world, our fellow people.  But I rejoice that there is a day coming when brokenness will no longer exist.  We will be whole. 

Until then, I find great encouragement from Paul’s words to the church in Corinth: 

“Finally, brothers and sisters, keep rejoicing and repair whatever is broken. Encourage each other, think as one, and live at peace; and God, the Author of love and peace, will remain with you.”

2 Corinthians 13:11 (The Voice)

 

Unleash Your kingdoms power
Reaching the near and far
No force of Hell can stop
Your beauty changing hearts
You made us for much more than this
Awake the kingdom seed in us
Fill us with the strength and love of Christ

We are Your church
We are the hope on earth

Build Your Kingdom Here, Rend Collective

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One of Satan's Biggest Lies to Mothers

I could barely make it to the car before I could feel the tears starting to fill my eyes.  It was the third day in a row I had picked up my oldest daughter and got a bad report on her behavior.  I was shocked it kept happening day after day.  I couldn’t offer the teacher a reason for her sudden behavior rebellion because it wasn’t something she was doing at home.  I felt at a loss.  Why was she acting this way all of the sudden?  What was I not doing right? 

My husband came home that evening and could recognize my stress immediately.  I poured it all out to him over a pot of boiling spaghetti noodles. 

“I feel like a failure.” I said. “I just don’t know why she’s acting this way and I can’t figure out how to help.”

He looked stunned that this series of bad reports had caused such a raw reaction from me.  “Babe, she’s two and a half.  This stuff is going to happen.  It’s okay.”

Even though in my mind I knew that she was most likely just having a rough week and was displaying typical two year old behaviors, I couldn’t shake the feeling that I wasn’t measuring up as her mother.  I thought somewhere or somehow I must have messed up to cause her to act out in this way.  Later that night as I laid my head on my pillow, I realized that this is one of Satan’s biggest lies to mothers.

You are a failure.

I had given him an open invitation to attack my shortcomings as a mother and he certainly took his opportunity.  I never suspected him.  He’s sneaky like that. 

It's not that our children can't be affected by our behaviors or choices, they can be.  But often times it is the enemy silently whispering to our heart you’re not good enough.  You’re a failure as a mother.

Maybe you’ve heard some of these very lies whispered to your heart:

You’re doing it wrong.

Look at the choices they're making.  That’s your fault.

Look at that mom.  She’s doing everything right.  You can never be like her.

You will never break the cycle of your past. 

You’ve been praying for this child for such a long time.  It’s not working! God’s not answering.

God doesn’t care about you or your child, otherwise he would fix this. 

We could go on and on.  It’s a downward slope full of his trickery and deceit.  Mama, you must remember his ultimate goal is to rob you of joy in raising your children, especially if you are raising them to follow Jesus. 

Oh yes.  There is nothing Satan wants more than to get inside the heart of a mama raising her babies for Jesus.  He will come after you harder than you can imagine. 

I don’t know if you’re a mama of little ones who is elbow deep in dirty diapers and just trying to keep one foot in front of the other, or if you’re a seasoned mama with older children who are facing some very adult decisions right now.  Either way, please hear my heart and words of encouragement for you this morning.

You are not a failure.

Maybe you have a wayward child that’s running as fast as they can away from the Lord and what you’ve taught them.  Or maybe you lost your temper with one of your little ones this morning when they were being defiant despite your best efforts.  Maybe your teenager is starting to make some choices that are not in line with their character.   

You are doing your best mama.  Give that child over to the Lord.  Don’t you believe Satan’s lie that you are a failure.

God cares about mothers.  God loves mothers.  He would never whisper to us that we are failing.

It’s true that children will make their own choices, and certain things are out of our control.  What we can do however, is provide them with the foundation of Christ.  If you are doing that, mama you’re doing alright.  No, more than alright.  You are doing great.

As mothers we have to arm ourselves first with the armor of God so that we can then arm our children.  We must be on guard.  We must recognize Satan’s lies.  


How do you know if it’s from God or from the enemy?

Satan’s whispers will always be ones of fear, judgement, insecurity, resentment and uncertainty. God whispers words of peace, comfort, grace, and security in Him.

As mama's we are often very good at recognizing our faults and limitations.  Satan will use these acknowledgements as opportunities to turn lies into what we think are truths.  

For example, patience is something I struggle with.  I know I need it, I just don't have that extra dose that other mama's seem to have. So Satan knows this about me (and yes, Satan knows things about you just as God does) and he attacks me when he knows my patience is thin.  Then the guilt comes. And my thoughts are turned to these:  "I didn't mean to be so impatient.  We were running late is all.  I feel terrible I got so frustrated with her.  I failed in this moment."

And there you go.  I let him win, just like that. Another way to recognize Satan's attack verses God's grace is to remember this: 

 Conviction comes from God.  Guilt comes from the enemy.  

It is crucial to our spiritual walk to understand the difference.  I may feel convicted to change my heart and to be more patient with my children, but guilt from being impatient comes from the enemy himself.  See the difference?

Oh mama, it is not an easy task to defeat the enemy's lies, but may I offer more encouragement to you today? 

Making mistakes and failing are two very different things as a mother.  We will make mistakes. We will lose our temper, raise our voices.  We will say the wrong things, even make the wrong decisions.  But we can grow and change because of grace.


Someone once told me that God perfectly matched children to their parents based off that child’s purpose and how it would align with His perfect plan for their lives.  This is a sweet reminder when I’m up against Satan’s lies. 

Maybe today you’re consumed with guilt over choices made in the past.  Or maybe your heart is burdened with worry for your children.  Maybe just maybe, you heard the enemy’s silent whispers today that you are a failure.  Keep these words in your heart today:

God loves you mama and He loves your children.  His intentions are always for good.

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